Scene 2 Hu Nu knew
Periwinkle walks in about twenty minutes later, kind of glowing, but refreshed. He kneels down to my shoes and says, “Po Dorothy! So sad, sexy ass FMP on this tourist. You have my pity.” Looking me in the eye, he stands and says, “Ready?”
He and Hunter elbow bump, fist pound with a rocket or something, our phones all ring this cute little fairy dust sound. Somebody moans. And all the women’s shoes shimmer like fireworks.
-from Glitterbox- Contract initiation sequence:
Transaction Approved
He takes off his glasses, polishes them on his shirt tail, puts them in his pocket, then drops the papers on the receptionist’s desk. I see Whynter and Shantel’s signatures, already on the documents.
With the prettiest blue stone fountain pen, he signs the last document saying, “Herbie Hancock.”
Signing the contracts with a beautiful pink granite ball point, Hunter bursts out a huge deep snorking, honking laugh, then she takes one of those cheap stick pens with the company logo and website on it out of the cup on the receptionist’s desk, and points to a line that reads, witness.
Eyeballing the desk and my behind, Periwinkle turns to Hunter and says, “Whoa! Fresh. Is that a black One Ring?” I lost mine a while back.”
Hunter fondles the glowing black ring hanging from the woven gold collar around her neck, says, “Yeah. I got it at Kintsukuroi-Shibari. After I read the book. I thought it was fresh and different because it had been shattered and reassembled. We smelted two yellow bricks worth of computer chips to reclaim the gold.”
Periwinkle grins bashfully and mumbles, “Cool, weird, but cool. Now that business is done. Hunter, I’ll see you and Nancy at the Pfunk Parade in the D in a couple of weeks. You are bringing Nancy? I mean if she doesn’t wanna come.I understand. It’s cool, but Benita and Sun are dying to take you two shopping in the Crystal Corridor. On that note, how is your reassignment?”
They did that fist pound thing again and all our phones made that Glitter sound.
-from Glitterbox- Contract fulfilled:
Transfer of funds complete.
10 Shit tonnes of Imagined Nation Glitter released to A.W.A. Publishing Division basket.
Hunter says, “Yeah! So, my Lovie chose a little T. Prime. Only seven and a half inches. Wanna see? Nah! We are so there. It is so great seeing you again, Bro. Love yo ass. But I’m staying in the drag I’m in. I’ve been livin’ as a lesbian all my life, I’m a good enough Asshole. I like my job. I ain’t about to start trying to play like I’m a straight man now. ‘Cept this fucker right here got nerve endings and blood and responses. Yeah! Responses.
Teledildonics. I’m her favorite toy fo sho. But yeah…
… So, yeah the book. Penman. Right. Anyway. Wait. wait. wait. P. Dawg, so is it wrong that I’m banging my dad’s secretary? I mean. Don’t hate me cause I’m beautiful. I’m so pretty.”
They hug. Periwinkle looks at me, stands up straight and says, “Now, If I walk these stairs two more times, I’ll have done half my walking for the morning. But, we ordered Kopi Luwak. So! Thank you Stacie. Now, please show me to a meeting room, where you can give me a rundown of my new division (YOUR DIVISION) and introduce me to the Creative Department.”
This old raggedy man is a beast, everything straight to the point, I’m not aroused ‘cause I’m pissed. First he calls me an inconsiderate tasteless bitch and then he suggests that I’m fat and out of shape. I’m aroused because he took my power and gave it back. Now I am intrigued. I want inside his head. I want access to his power.
He sniffs the air, looks at me, smiles and says, “Like I said outside, Ain’t happenin’ Indigo Obsession. Besides, I’m a Sapio-Sexual. I’m not your type. You know. Your type, D. T., Fuck E. Cheese all day. After parties, gallery openings, spas and shit. Saxophonists, bikers, dope boys, IT Thugs, Wallstreet niggaz from Cardboard City types. Freaknik types. You never get tired of winning. I can smell it on you. But here’s a little tid-bit. Something about you that you don’t know about yourself. You take your shoes off before you fuck. Then you get mad and say, ‘But we made love.’
Because to you, the only difference between fuckin’ and making love is how the dick you fuckin makes you feel about you. And the tokens of affection that express that they know you like that, don’t hurt none. With you love is like a tennis score. Who needs love like that?
Me and Ducktown here, we go back like them green lawn chairs in the background.
I hear a woman giggle.
Periwinkle says, “That is my copy editor, I’m here to get you out of her hair.” Tapping the flashing pale blue gem behind his ear he says, “Miss Dehr Whyte, how long before coffee is served?”
Just seconds later, the backlighted gemstone on his ear piece blinks once and Captain Whyte steps off the elevator behind two people pushing room service carts. She hands him his little flip phone, which he promptly stuffs in his jacket pocket, pats twice saying, “Phone.”
While she takes his headphones and earcuff. Phones all over the office make that glitter sound again, she then pours his coffee from a little French press and says, “Sir.” Serves Periwinkle another crystal cup. Takes the first crystal cup from my hand, says, “Shiny thing.”, hands it to the butler, who puts it under the room service cart. I almost cried. It felt so good.
She curtsies to him, saying “…for everyone else, three minutes in conference room C. Periwinkle, the train back to Chicago leaves in three hours. I’ve mapped you out a cool walk past some of your favorite spots, your Mott’s Sister is meeting you at the library bar in Chinatown, and accommodations for Ms. Palimpsest ‘s flat will be completed by the end of the day.
Shiny Things has gotten everything prepared for her welcoming party tonight.
Sun and Shantel’s mom will meet her if and when she arrives in Detroit.”
-Ding-
– from Joe’s coffee-
126 cups of Kopi Luwak 1.1375 tGlitter
I’m thinking that’s like $1050.00
42 6oz lead crystal coffee service sets. 3.251 tGlitter Rush Service 0.551 tGlitter,
I’m reading out loud now, “Really? Snacks, condiments and delivery No additional costs.
Thank you
Total 10.213 tonne of Glitter Joe.”
That big redhead continues, “And, I responded to Shantel and Whynter’s text messages of she reads his phone, ‘Thanks for not putting Ms. Palimpsest over your knee and spanking her right there in the lobby, with ‘You got it! Love you Baby Gurl, Elmira.’ Will that suffice, sir? Leans over my shoulder saying, “It’s about $4515.00.”
That’s when I completely lost my shit, “SHANTEL SAID YOU WUZ AN ASSHOLE. BUT FOR REAL! REALLY! YOU SON OF A BITCH! FOUR THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED AND FIFTEEN DOLLARS, FOR WHAT? WHAT THE FUCK IS COPY LOO WACK ANYWAY? AND WHO YOU THINKIN’ ‘BOUT PUTTIN’ OVA YO KNEE? I READ THAT SHIT YOU SAID IN THE CHAT.
! You ain’t my daddy or my lover Nigah. I’m a grown ass woman. I’ll fah…
-Ding-
– from Joe- Invoice paid via Glitterbox by P. Bubbz
Thank you.
That big bitch is standing over me, tappin’ that crop on her boot. He smiles sadly and says, “You offered to pay. I was gettin’ it anyway. What? You act like you ain’t rich and shit. Diamond encrusted Rolex is faceless… Oh I knew you didn’t mean it. Suck up.”
-Ding Ding-
The Murder of Exes and the haters’ club have issued a Yellow Card in the name of your account.
Present value: 3.75 Shittonnes of INGlitter = exchange in USD
=0.25 million dollars. To read terms of agreement go to thehaters.club/yellowcard/ and enter your safeword.
I’m thinking that’s about my share of this division.
He says, “Fah – Don’t worry about it Stacie. Captain Whyte, pay the bill please. Use my Glitterbox. This…
…She, is harshing my mellow. Please keep her social distance.”
I’m staring at this chick, when she says, “It’s done Periwinkle. Now let it go.” Then that big Red head says, “Sir.”, he turns, she hands him a plush green box with beautiful blue butterflies tied to a soft white cord, he blushes, smiles and says, “Xiao Mao. Zhège gěi ni.”
He wiggles his little rump, says, “Thank you Captain. Now show me the way to room C, please.”
The members of the creative department are waiting in their studio, smiling and confident like I’ve never seen them. And for the first time, all at the same time. They stopped sipping on their coffee or tea or what ever Copy Loo Wack is and introduce themselves one by one.
First, My admin Judy, looks over her glasses at me as she walks past saying, something like, 你比我想像的更有吸引力 Hi Mister Day. I’m Judy Woah, your Copy Editor.” The plush little gothic anime librarian says with a slow breathy voice, “我可以 和你一起去底特律吗？ 我想要 成为你的宠物。 带我离开这里。请”
I’m like, Bitch, what did you just say?
Taking the pins out of her top knot and letting her silky cornflower blue hair spill over her wide behind, “I asked him if I could go to Detroit with him and be his pet. It’s the Kopi Luwak talking. Vellocet, you really should try it.” Judy looks genuinely surprised, “Anywho. I didn’t say that. I didn’t mean to, but I did. Yeah! It’s the Kopi Luwak talking. This is the best cup I’ve ever had in my life! Miss Palimpsest, have you tried it? Mr…” He says, “Periwinkle, please, Kitten. Please! Really! You think so?”
Judy says, “…Periwinkle. Right. I know we did the creative for Stacie’s book, and because of the promotion, it’s a massive hit, but when I finally sat down to read it. I was really unhappy that it was nothing like our advertising projects. It is so much better. Would you sign my galleys? I don’t think you’re going to get the same reader numbers for the next book in the series. We are publishing the other six right? Say yes. Please.”
He’s just staring at me while I fume, thinking. I’m Senior Accounts Executive, and in charge of new authors. I got a bottom line to answer to. When he says, “Yo, Judy. Ni shì yī zhī, Xiao Māo. For real forreal! I’m honored. Stand next to me please, Kitten. I’m kind of nervous right now. Thank you Xiao māo. Zhège gěi ni.”
He holds the box out to her, she pulls the cord and the butterflies fly off the box and around the room. She sings, “Lapid-thopters, I’ll tell all you about them one day. I still can’t Twerk. See!” She drops her bottom low and makes her butt cheeks bounce individually.
“Yeah. You can! He smiles and bows formally to her. Takes off the lid. Judy extracts an identical copy of his speckled yellow green headphones, he says,
“#D.A.D.88C. Sliced Asian Pear, the first off the line. It’s wonderfully nice to finally meet my Otaku.
My Otaku Meganekko, in real life. Wow!
So, who do you think would appreciate the product? Everyone – Anyone?” He puts the lid back on the box and sits it on her writing desk. “Anyway, you’re always between my ears.”
Judy takes the cord from his hand, walks across the room to me, stands about three feet in front of me, kneels, wraps the cord around her neck, leans forward, flips her hair. He walks to her and loops a ring on the cord, ties a pretty knot, and whispers, “Thank you. I’m going to spank your ass later.” She, looks me in the eye saying, “Then I will read to you until you sleep.” He kisses her forehead, straightens up, and hands me an envelope and says, “Your debts are paid.” He pats her rump, she stands, clears her throat, still staring me in the eye, using all of her well trained composure right now, “Well, I believe your true audience are fiscally conservative, heritics, atheists, gnostic or agnostic, Sapio-sexual…”
The butterflies light on her headphones and her adorable little saddle oxfords softly pulse shimmering pale lavendar light.
Walking away, he says to me, “It’s often an uncomfortable
condition these days. Right Xiao Mao?”
Judy crosses back to him, leans into his chest, snuggles in, yawns and continues. “…Ecologically concerned, patrons of the arts and the humanities. The kind of people that collect first editions, manuscripts and vinyl records. People that contribute to green upgrades to major institutions. People like me.
I was sad, because book one was so short. But for a dollar ninety nine, it was worth buying the digital edition Stacie published. And, I bought an advance copy of Book Seven L.E. popup folio too. At a pound of Glitter, with three years to pay it off, it’s a great deal. I’m giving it to my niece. She’s turning six next week…”
I’m thinking, I thought this was some kind of erotica
Judy saying, “…It’s a brilliant piece of work. Stacie, gurl, you really should try this coffee. I came.” The server offers her more, but she refuses, “Oh no thank you, please. I’d really like to cuddle and go to sleep. I literally and figuratively had a Kopi Luwak orgasm. Oh my. Baba, can we take our walk soon? Or go to my room and spoon? Oh My Goodness. I said that.”
He’s blushing, I’m trippin’ now for sure. “Gala: What’s a Say-Pee-Oh Sexual?”
